amazingavengers:

beifag:

k1mkardashian:

girls think having a period sucks but try having to fix your penis discreetly through your pocket 

having the insides of your organs shed and come out through your genitals does not compare to having displaced balls sorry

none of you can do it discreetly anyways

crocobaby:

Do you think every president goes through a awkward first few weeks in office when they’re not sure when’s the right time to ask if aliens are real or not?

studip:

if u askin about my bra size u better be planning on takin ur ass down to Victoria’s Secret to buy me some nice bras

nintendofunclub:

c0caino:

Take your age and add 5 to it. That is your age in 5 years.

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meridahair:

thatswhatgeeksdo:

GUYS THIS IS WHY ALL THOSE PHOTOS OF DANIEL RADCLIFFE WITH TWELVE DOGS KEPT POPPING UP THEY WERE FILMING

I liked it better when it was just DanRad randomly smoking while walking a million dogs

meridahair:

thatswhatgeeksdo:

GUYS THIS IS WHY ALL THOSE PHOTOS OF DANIEL RADCLIFFE WITH TWELVE DOGS KEPT POPPING UP THEY WERE FILMING

I liked it better when it was just DanRad randomly smoking while walking a million dogs

lucidnee:

prettypussyprincess:

if u wit ur girl

and she put her phone down like this:

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u mostly likely a side nigga stay woke

Can y’all stop giving away secrets

mishaesque:

my favourite legend from the norse mythology is when a giant steals mjolnir and says he’ll give it back if he can have Freyja as his bride, but she refuses to go so instead Thor dresses up as her and Loki as her handmaiden and then at the wedding the giant places mjolnir in his bride’s (thor) lap and thor reveals himself and kills everybody and if that shouldn’t be made a short film with I don’t know what should

underthenerdhood:

a little girl who grows up thinking all doors are automatic but actually she’s haunted by a really polite ghost

dylanohcryin:

nothing fucked me up more than hearing the line “now they’re going to bed and my stomach is sick, and it’s all in my head but she’s touching his chest” in mr brightside and REALIZING THAT SICK AND CHEST DON’T RHYME… ….SH E’S NOT TOUCHIGN HIS CHEST…..

fauxhawks:

THEY ACTUALLY DID IT

nico-diangelcakes:

nico-diangelcakes:

So i have this giant pencil right

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I think we all know where this is going.

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the amount of people saying that they were expecting me to shove it up my ass is alarming